• SUCCESSES
• SERVICES
  • LIFE COACHING SERVICES
  • SPEAKING
  • INTUITION IN BUSINESS
• HOW WE DO IT
• WHAT'S NEW
• CALENDAR
• ABOUT US
  • BIO
  • OUR PHILOSOPHY
  • WHY CHOOSE US
• CONTACT

Qatana Samanen, Ph.D.

"I feel privileged to participate in a process that empowers my clients to transform their lives for the better. "

SUCCESSES - Establishing a more balanced life

A partner in a mid-sized law firm uses career coaching to gain clarity, enabling him to achieve a desired career change and further his professional development

SITUATION

Peter was a successful accountant who had resigned his partnership in a large firm to set off on his own after a conflict with the other partners. He knew what he needed to do to establish his independent practice but he found himself procrastinating. No matter how much he told himself that he must get busy contacting prospective clients, he could not get down to business.

The more Peter sat around doing nothing, the worse he felt. When Peter showed up in my office his depression was palpable. His angry frustration at his inactivity was undermining his ability to move forward. He sought life coaching to move beyond his procrastination and achieve his goals.

LIFE COACHING APPROACH

It was obvious after speaking briefly with Peter that further discussion of the situation would only mean following him around in the rut he had been digging for himself for weeks. Instead, we used Interactive Imagery to move the work to a different, more productive level. I invited Peter to let his hands do the talking.

When you are facing a choice between two options or when there is inner conflict, an effective way to engage intuitive knowing is to ask each hand to take one side of the issue. A detached perspective is created and clarity is gained when each position is expressed through “listening” to the hands.

Peter’s right hand identified itself as “You Should”. This was the hand which expressed his drive to accomplish the things he needed to do to succeed.

Peter’s left hand declared truculently, “I don’t want to.” The left hand expressed his resistance to acting. With a little further exploration it became clear that this was not only negative or reactionary. The focus of the left hand was actually on the need to clarify Peter’s values and purpose in life, now that he had left the high pressure environment of the accounting firm that had controlled his life for so long.

Pressed by the left hand to define the meaning in his life, Peter recognized that his love for his wife and grown children was the most important thing to him. For the first time he recognized the opportunity available to him for balancing work and professional life.

Peter’s right hand informed him that sitting in his office doing nothing was a significant part of the problem. ‘You Should’ insisted, “You have to take care of business. Set a time to do it and then do it at that specific time.” The hand made it clear to Peter how important it was for him to use the time he spent in his office constructively. If he did not have an activity planned, he needed to leave the office rather than sitting around down on himself for doing nothing.

Following this guidance, Peter and I used Solution Focused Coaching to design a schedule for the coming week, setting aside those times when he would be in the office, attending to business. It was understood that he would not go to the office at any other time.

Then we asked “I Don’t Want To” what Peter could do in the times between his scheduled activities. The left hand urged him to spend that time interacting more with people. Peter had not realized how isolating it would be to be off on his own. At his old firm he had countless encounters with others throughout the day. Peter had been unaware of the impact these interactions had on his sense of well-being.

The left hand suggested to Peter that he pursue volunteering. This represented a real turning point. The Left Hand had moved beyond resisting what needed to be done and was now suggesting possibilities of action that would create a more balanced life for Peter. Peter liked the suggestion of volunteering and resolved to explore the possibilities.

The Left Hand then encouraged Peter to consider ways he could spend more time with his wife and kids. As is the case with many hard working professionals, Peter’s success had come at the expense of his relationships with his son and his daughter. The left hand urged Peter to take advantage of the spaciousness of time available to him to interact with his wife more and to reach out to his children in ways he had never done before.

At the very end of the session I asked the two hands if they would be willing to consider taking new names that more accurately reflected their respective positions. The hands were glad to express the transformation that had occurred during our session, the right hand now being called “I can” and the left hand, “I will”.

This was much more than a matter of semantics. By exploring below the surface to discover what the resistance to action actually was, Peter was able to connect with values he truly held. His resistance to getting back into the high powered life that had characterized his time at the large accounting firm was not based in inadequacy, fear or laziness, as he had assumed. Rather it reflected legitimate concerns not to waste this opportunity for balancing work and personal life. Once he was able to acknowledge the value of this, Peter was freed to move forward in developing his new practice in a way that left room in his life for other valuable activities.

Peter returned a week later totally transformed. He had accomplished everything we had outlined on the schedule. Because there were clearly defined periods of time with specific activities assigned to them, Peter did not feel like a failure during the in-between times when he was not working to develop his practice.

Instead, he got out of his office and used that time to do other things that enriched his life. He began volunteering to do tax work in retirement homes. He also derived deep satisfaction from having gotten together with both his son and his daughter in the week since we had met.

RESULTS

Peter has established a successful accounting practice while enjoying a more balanced life.

• Peter moved ahead to establish a successful accounting practice
• He enjoys life more because he is successfully balancing work and personal life
• He spends more time with his family
• Engaging in volunteer work has given his life added meaning

The guidance that Peter received from his inner wisdom through Interactive Imagery was not different from what I might have suggested. However, had I made those suggestions when Peter was as stuck as he had been, it is unlikely that he would have been able to follow through with them. He was too immobilized by self-blame.

Seeking guidance from within himself connected Peter with those very real aspects of strength and competence that are an integral part of who he is. By accessing his own inner wisdom as the source of guidance, Peter empowered himself to act on a plan that transformed his thoughts, feelings and behavior and enabled him to achieve his goals.

To learn more about how life coaching can help you improve productivity click here...

To learn more about how life coaching can help you with balancing work and personal life click here...